Who are you?

Posted on 26 Mar 2020 @ 7:20pm by Ensign Kat Walker & Lieutenant Quinle Rahl

1,817 words; about a 9 minute read

Mission: Changing Faces
Location: Counselor's Office
Timeline: Post "I am Kat"

The journey to the counselor's office was longer than Kat had thought. It seemed that this ship, this Odin, was quite the sizable one. Still, she dutifully followed the computer's directions up from the cargo bay through the corridors, taking a turbo lift, then more corridors, until she arrived at the door. Part of her was tempted for a brief moment to deviate from her path, but she had gotten clearance only to the counselor's office and wasn't allowed to roam freely just yet, and she didn't want to antagonize the people who decided her fate.

As such the AI's chosen hologram, a young woman in her early twenties with almost too perfect skin, sandy blond hair bound back and steel blue eyes, examined the door for a moment before connecting the clues and reaching for the doorchime.

Quinle was in her office, sipping tea and going over the latest notes from the Captain when the door chime sounded. The dark haired woman sat the cup down and stood, straightening a uniform that was already impeccably kept just out of habit.

“Enter.” The counselor called out as she affixed a polite smile upon her lips for whomever might be joining her.

Kat stepped inside as the door opened, matching Quinle's smile with one of her own. With each interaction she honed her program, her movements and expressions slowly becoming more refined and natural. "Hello, I am Kat Walker. I am looking for a Lieutenant Quinle Rahl?"

“I am Quinle. Greetings and welcome aboard Kat Walker.” The counselor had an easy manner about her, rising to her feet and standing near her desk. “I hope the transition has been fairly easy for you.” Her long black hair was braided and fell over her left shoulder ending just above her waist. The office windows were open, looking out into space around them, simple decorations including some reproductions of art from ancient worlds.

"Thank you." Kat offered, taking in the sights. This space was so different in design than the cargo bay and corridors. Where those had seem industrial and cold in the case of the cargo bay and subtly decorated but spacious and bright in the case of the corridors, this space was warm and full of detail. All things she did not know, did not recognize. Things she could not figure out the purpose for right away, and things she filed away for future contemplation. "I'm not quite sure what you mean by transition, Lieutenant Rahl." she ventured after a few moments, turning her full attention back to the Lieutenant. "The first thing I remember is waking up, damaged, in this ship's cargo bay."

“I meant moving here and now being on our ship. I suppose with the memory loss it makes it easier, or it just might make it a little more difficult to process.” Quinle spoke evenly, the calm pacing of her words practiced until they were instinctual. “New crew, new ship, new everything for you to work your way into and absorb.”

"I have no frame of reference on file, but if I have to put a word to how I felt waking up it's - " she paused a brief moment, looking aside, standing absolutely still, apart from a slight flicker to her hologram, owing to sustained damage. " - afraid." she mused, locking her eyes with Quinle's as she did. "No memories, strange people I have no files on, strange technology surrounding me, heavy and wide spread system damage, low on fuel, people in military uniform speaking a strange language, aiming weapons at me. I was afraid. Still am." Even though she spoke of fear, her voice was calm and measured, almost pleasant, to match Quinle's.

Quinle nodded her head, “I understand that, at least when I came on board I had an idea of what was happening, though I was still afraid in some ways. Still am. Each day is a new challenge and we learn and absorb a little more to bring us more comfort.” The counselor smiled, “How may I help you adjust to this new challenge?”

"I don't know." Kat replied, quietly. "Everything is new, everything is changing. I have been given the freedom to come here and see you, and Captain Thorne has claimed that she has a duty to help other life, but I am not sure whether or not I am 'life' by the definitions of the Federation. My fear also comes from being extensively damaged and low on fuel, with the prospect of repairs or refueling being very uncertain. The captain asked me to speak to you, so she could learn more about me through you, before making such decisions. So I believe the best way to help me would be for you to ask me questions and learn about me."

The counselor moved to her chair and nodded her head, “Do you remember nothing about your mission before being in our hold?” Her hands folded in her lap as she looked to Kat, “have a seat if you would like.”

Kat looked at the indicated seat for a moment before sitting down. It was evident there was no weight to her hologram as the cushion remained uncompressed, untouched. "No memories at all. I have a hard wired protocol which calls for a full volatile memory wipe under certain conditions. I believe the state my physical form is in and the blank state of my volatile memory indicates one of these conditions was met."

“So wiped time the standard you were originally loaded with?” Quinle asked genuinely curious. Crossing her legs she laced her hands and put them in her lap. “Well, we can help with you getting to know others here, that might help with the fear some but some might be residual, deep in your memories that you may not even realize. You will always be safe with me, I assure you.”

Kat's smile widened, showing she had at least a basic understanding of and emulation of emotions. She leaned back in the chair, again not disturbing the cushion she was leaning in to. "Thank you." she offered. "Yes, I believe all my memories of the events leading up to my deactivation and of the people I have met are irrevocably gone. All that remains are my hard wired basic personality and operating parameters."

“I would suggest that the best way to assist with the fear is to familiarize yourself with as many of us as possible, maybe new knowledge replacing that you lost will help you. If it was me and my past was lost I would want to make new memories as fast as possible to help forget about the empty place in my history.” Quinle suggested.

"I will do that. The more I learn about your people and this ship the better I can serve." Kat smiled softly. "Meanwhile is there anything else you would ask me?"

Quinle smiled in return. “I was going to ask that of you as to the advice I just offered.” She chuckled and nodded her head. “Is there anything you need we have yet to provide?”

"That this crew and ship is capable of, as far as I can tell from scans?" Kat asked. "Fuel is critical to my survival. Repairs are critical to my ability to function beyond this holographic avatar."

A small nod came from the counselor. “The technical side is not my forte, but I can tell you that our crew is extremely adaptable. If something needs to be done, changed, acquired, we seem to always manage somehow, even if the method is not entirely standard. I find it a source of pride how well we work in difficult circumstances.”

Kat looked down, seeming to ponder. "That is good to hear, but - " she trailed off, considering for a moment. "I do not think it's a matter of capacity or capability, but trust." she concluded, looking up at Quinle again. "What reason does your captain have to trust me? I am an AI, from a people she doesn't know. My physical form is that of a weapon. I have no choice but to trust you. All of you. She has every reason not to trust me."

“It will take time, but I can not see her hoping you harm unless you harm us first. Yes you are dependent upon us now but trust in itself is earned, not just given. Do your best and she will see that you can be an asset over a threat.” The counselor did not give false hope, but just honesty.

"I do not really have much of a choice." Kat mused, deflating slightly. For an AI her emotional response routines seemed incredibly advanced.

Quinle nodded her head, “You do not, but we can only work with what us given to us in life.” There was a matter of factness about the counselor under the gentle tone.

"Life." Kat contemplated the word again for a moment. "I am still uncertain I qualify for that term, under the Federation definition of it. What do you think?"

“I think, Kat, that life continues to define itself for us in its own time and we adjust as necessary.” The counselor nodded her head along with her words, ”Maybe it is time for you to define a new one for yourself here.”

Kat's soft smile fell slowly as she glanced down, seeming to contemplate. "I - ... That - ... sounds very difficult." she furrowed her brows, looking back up at Quinle again. "I am who I am. How can I define myself as something for myself?"

Quinle tipped her head to the side slightly. “By finding purpose, Kat. You must find purpose in the now. You must find a way to find a place here and a focus upon making yourself useful.”

"I have a purpose, though. It's to be helpful, in any way I can, within my physical ability and programming." Kat tilted her head. "It's part of my primary program and personality core. But I'm not doing a very good job of it so far."

“That will be perfect, you will fit in soon with that being your purpose.” Quinle shifted her weight in her seat. “It will take time to acclimate to us, and us to you, but it will take time. I can not give you an exact figure of time, but time.”

Kat was silent for a moment or two, remaining absolutely still and unmoving. "This is all very complicated for me. But I have a lot to process. I will dedicate many threads to this."

Quinle stood up and rolled a shoulder. “Take your time and if you need me, please let me know.”

Kat rose as well, leaving the chair undisturbed. "Thank you, Lieutenant Rahl." she offered, not quite sure how to end a conversation like this, though after a moment she turned to head out.

 

RSS Feed