Frauds, flowers and floats

Posted on 11 Nov 2020 @ 2:01pm by Commander Kristiana Petrova & Lieutenant Callisi Veera

964 words; about a 5 minute read

Mission: Ab Intra
Location: Planetside, flower festival

The festivities for the flower festival had gone on all day. They were already underway when the two arrived in town and were underway still when they were done with their meal. An endless parade of floats, lights, music and dancers made their way through the city. A bench along the route was easily found, which saw the two simply enjoying the anonymity of being lost in a crowd that was infinitely more elaborately and extravagantly dressed than they were.

"They're beautiful." Callisi whispered, trying not to ruin the moment of the music and the excitement with being loud. The majesty and color of the floats impressed even her discerning eye. "The colors, the motions, the music... this.." a pause, then the Daughter of Ts'usu turned to Kris, "This... is exactly what the crew needs. A celebration of life, of beauty, just.... something so upbeat." she turned her attention back to the floats. Truth be told, it had been a long time since Callisi saw a parade.

"Yeah," Kris agreed after too long of a moment of silence. "It's - nice. Pretty. I like the music too," she added, though it was fairly obvious she was lost in thought, and not all of them seemed too pleasant.

"Koku for your thoughts?" Callisi opened up the floor to discussion.

The Russian woman considered for a moment before heaving a sigh, leaning back and speaking. "So, you wanted honesty. Alright." She hesitated a moment before continuing. "Sitting here, happy music, pretty colors, beautiful floats, dancers, enjoying the company - I feel like a fraud. It was me who ordered you experimented on," beat "Well, not you specifically. But crew. I know, I was taken over by a hostile alien, it wasn't really me, blah blah blah, but - it was my voice. It is my own memory telling me it was me. And I have to find a way to make that rhyme with - everything else. I feel like by all rights you should hate my guts for what I've put you through."

A parade float or two went by before the Daughter of Ts'usu found her words. The one I'll have the hardest time trusting will be the doctor." she started. "But the whole reason for this, for all of this, is for us to re-evaluate. To re-educate, and to re-experience our impressions. For some, it's the chance to meet someone again for the first time. For others, it's finding a way to look past the recent events to see what started this all."

"I don't blame you for the orders that thing gave while in possession of you. Whether you lacked some way to resist, or it overpowered you, makes little difference. It controlled you, to the point where your own morals and ethics were nonapplicable." a pause, "Your road to redemption may be a long one, but it begins here, and now. I forgive you."

"Thank you," Kris spoke after a moment's silence, closing her eyes, shoulders slumping a bit in relief. She reached a hand over to rest on Callisi's for a brief moment, giving a slight squeeze. "Then maybe, in time, I can forgive myself as well," she continued. "Probably gonna be a while, though."

There was a flash of concern at the contact, but Callisi tried to relax. Sorry, we don't do that... is what she wanted to say. Instead, after just a brief moment of the squeeze, Callisi's other hand came along to give Kris' hand a pat-pat before both hands withdrew to her lap. "You heal at your own pace." she said to reassure. "Seeking ones own forgiveness is often the hardest to ask. Don't feel discouraged if it takes longer than you want."

If Kris noticed the initial discomfort from the touch she didn't show, though her melancholic expression lit up somewhat at the reciprocated touch. She remained silent for a moment, just watching the parade, before speaking again. "Meh, I shouldn't complain. Lots of people got taken over. Did things. And they're going to be looking at me for guidance, being first officer."

"Everyone has done things. I can't possibly compare these events to the totality of what we've all been through, but we'll make it. Each of us, in our own way, in our own time." she started. "And, if you are having trouble, Gamma shift. I'll work up something on the Simulation Room" a pause, "Or, Holodeck as you call them. Since..... since we're never going home, I can bend the rules a little. And if we do make it back, I'd just need everyone to swear to forget what they saw."

"Sounds fair?"

Kris chuckled. "Yeah. Remind me when we're back on the ship and I've got my rank back on to give you blanket permission for whatever it is you're planning," she smiled. It wasn't a bright smile, in fact it was rather faint - but it was an honest one. "Gamma shift was always my favorite. Just - the night owls and the ship. The quiet hum of the warp core. The lighting turned down. Walking the corridors of a starship in solitude, there's a lot of peace in a situation like that. Philosophy too."

"It took me a few days to get used to Federation starships, their hum." she started, "Ts'usugi ships are quiet. No hum, no buzz. Nothing." she offered, and then gave a nod, "I'll certainly remind you, if nothing else, to help the ship and the crew as much as possible."

"I'm always willing to help."

"Don't think I could sleep in perfect silence," Kris made a face. "But I guess it's just what you're used to. The hum soothes me. It's a comforting presence. It means that everything's alright," she added.

 

RSS Feed